When Physics Meets Lingerie: Kellie K Apparel

 This a pretty accurate tableau of my bedroom floor (almost wrote flaw, Freudian slip maybe?) at all times. Textbooks and reference books, abandoned, slide out from under the bed covers (my place of choice for all work) and come to rest on the floor. Lingerie advances, in it's clean form, almost to my designated lingerie draw but falls short. Worn lingerie gets flung across the room in a spontaneous fit, one born from a last minute need for bedtime, and joins it's comrades. On my bedroom floor my two greatest loves, Lingerie and Physics, meet and join forces in the art of guilt tripping (and just plain tripping me up). But this is the only time, so far in my twenty years of life, that these two subjects, have come together. Until about an hour ago, when i read Petite and Plentiful's introduction to Kellie K Apparel. 
Kellie K Apparel have been on my twitter feed for a while, promoting their upcoming strapless bra, but i've never taken too much notice. Plain strapless bras don't make for the most interesting tweets and i have a pretty darn good strapless bra anyway. Let's forget it's actually a bikini top for now. P&P however mentioned that these particular strapless bras, which are still in the prototype and funding phase of their manufacture, utilise "GeckTeck", which is derived from the science that allows Geckos to stick to walls. Now it's a common misconception that Geckos perform this feat of gravity defiance via vacuum theory. After a brief exchange on twitter i was very, very excited to discover that "GeckTeck" was indeed, correctly built upon the principal of Van Der Waal interactions between atoms. Kellie K Apparel have promised to release a video soon explaining some of the science behind their bra adhesive but i thought i'd have a crack at explaining the underlying principle of Van Der Waal interactions here too. In the hopes that some of my readers will find this application of Physics in lingerie production just as exciting as i do.

Van Der Waals Forces: Weak attractive forces between atoms or molecules which vary inversely as the sixth power of the interatomic or intermolecular distance, and are due to the momentary dipoles caused by the fluctuation in the electronic configuration of the atoms or molecules.
Bit of a mouthful eh? And not very helpful for those who don't study physics (alright, or Chemistry). This isn't an easy principle to explain as it relies on a precursory knowledge of electric fields and atomic/molecular interaction so, if you're interested, there are some great resources i can guide you to for further study on this subject.
Van Der Waals interactions arise from fluctuating dipoles in atoms and molecules. Dipole fluctuations are a quantum mechanical manifestation and are electrostatic in nature. 
What does this mean? In molecules or atoms electrons move around. Electrons are Leptons (fundamental particles) and have a charge of approximately -1e (or −1.602176565(35)×10−19 C to be a little more accurate). This means that when they move around, they create an excess of charge on one side of the atom or molecule. In an instant these electrons can move over to the opposite side and create and excess of flux over there instead. This phenomenon is called a fluctuating dipole. When electrons flow or move about with time they create an electric field and so this movement gives the molecule a temporary polarity. The electric field in this molecule will induce a dipole in any non-polar molecules it comes into contact with, creating a dipole moment. This dipole moment always manifests as an attractive force between the molecules. So these molecules will be attracted to each other and an equal or greater force will be needed to overcome the attraction. This attraction, known as Van Der Waals interaction, is what occurs between the spatula on geckos' legs and the wall. 
And these are the exact same principles Kellie K Apparel use to create their "geckteck" adhesive which promises to keep a strapless bra in place on your body. Exciting, right? As it stands now these bras need a lot of funding to be put into production and have a kickstarter page where they hope to gain crowd funding. For me, this is an incredibly exciting application of a particularly boring branch of physics and i'm eager to see the development of this idea (and maybe one day own a Kellie K bra of my own!)

Lingerie Regrets

With the exception of a few bob in my bank account, the change pictured here is all the money i have right now. Moving apartments and the steady decline of shifts at work due to the summer months have contributed to my incredible lack of money. So until the day my student loan rolls in and frees me up a little, i'm pinching the pennies. Something i've been doing to wise up on my spending, is going through my lingerie. I've identified that i have a big problem with buying lingerie that never gets worn. In fact i have such a problem that i can actually categorise my recurring mistakes into one of the following:
Size.
This is by far the most ridiculous problem of my lingerie hoarding and tends to intensify around the sales. I've been known to splurge on sizes considerably larger than my own by convincing myself that i'm secretly a 34B (or something equivalently dumb like pretending my arse is a size 6). Considering my whole life revolves around logical thought, in particular when handling numbers, i'd say this is a pretty embarrassing problem. So i buy the underwear i really want, in a size that will never fit me, and it, quite rightly, sits in my lingerie box (oh y'know, the one us hoarders have specifically for bras and knickers that don't fit) indefinitely. Clearly i need to tackle my impulse buying.
Shape.
I'm aware of the shape of my chest, very much so. But it doesn't stop me buying bras that are quite obviously better suited to a different shape. The bra pictured was a cheap ebay find but i should've known straight off the bat that this bra wouldn't fit. The lace at the top has nothing to sit flat against, so bunches and gapes and the cups hold their largest volume closest to the centre gore so they gape as well. All in all i did an exceptional job at forgoing all logic in the eyes of a pretty, cheap, bra. The shameful thing is that i never seem to learn and i own a fair few bras with exactly the same problem.
Practicality.
It's scarily easy to blindside me to practicality. If it's pretty, cutesy or unusual i'll always tend to completely forget how utterly useless the garment will be. 
This garter belt is one of the only "extravagant" pieces from Topshop's lingerie line that i've actually splurged full price for. I'm such a sucker for a white/pale pink colourway, especially if it has bows and frills. What i completely forgot is that i only wear garter belts when i'm wearing thigh highs. And i only wear thigh highs under my work clothes. Clothes which just so happen to be tight fitting. So the frills and the embellishments are highly impractical unless you're a fan of looking lumpy. Which i am not.
This AP bra, albeit utterly gorgeous, is completely unwearable in any practical sense. If someone would care to enlighten me as to what purpose a demi bra actually serves i'd be very grateful. This bra is a perfect colour, gorgeously constructed and fits like a glove. But what use is a bra that doesn't fully encompass my nipples and looks particularly strange underneath clothes, seriously? And most importantly why are all the high end bras i want demi?
Comfort.
I have so many of these bras (and knickers). They look comfortable, and feel absolutely cosy the first time you try them on but two hours into a six hour lab session and you find yourself counting the change in your purse so you can catch a bus home to change. Yup, this Boux Avenue bra has proven to be so uncomfortable that i can't bring myself to wear it for any longer than a couple of hours. Sometimes i like to look at it forlornly, and remember the high hopes i had for it to join my summer wardrobe. Unfortunately i'm no fortune teller, so i can hardly spot an uncomfortable piece of lingerie before i've even worn it. But it's something to take into consideration anyway. 

Guest Post: Amélie

A little Posie for your viewing pleasure
Lamb's note: I've been looking for someone to write a guest post, or a few, for a while. Sometimes things get a little quiet around here because i have no new lingerie (and no income) or because my life has all of a sudden become hectic. I like to keep an average of 2 or 3 new posts a week so i've wanted to use these quiet times to allow those who are crazy about lingerie but not crazy enough to run an entire blog dedicated to their collection, a chance to play Lamb. Amélie contacted me about enjoying this blog and we're still deep in conversation two days later (although by the time this post goes live i reckon it'll be a four/five day long conversation). Apparently our brains were separated at birth, in particular when it comes to lingerie (i'm serious i either own or really want to own everything in this post), TV, Game of Thrones, relationships, food, err well the list goes on. So i'm super pleased and excited to host the very first guest post on oflambsandlace, and even happier that it's Amélie 

A quick overview of me:
Name: You can call me Amélie
Age: 22
Location: Eastern England (but I'm American, pesky accent and all)
Lingerie collected for: ~7/8 years
Size: 29 A / UK 4-6
Favorite designers and companies: Chantall Thomass, Agent Provocateur, Princesse Tam Tam, La Perla, Free People, Kimchi Blue
Favourite food: Sushi and candy
Hobbies outside underwear hoarding: Running, watching trashy reality tv and foreign films, studying languages and psychology, playing video games, traveling, and kissing all the smooshy faced dogs
Drawers dedicated to only lingerie: 3 and counting (the shame)
Hello everyone! When I heard Lamb was looking for guest writers to show off their lingerie favourites or collections I jumped at the chance, I am not a well known blogging entity but I am an avid reader (read, a creep. As in when I first found this blog I read every post down to the very first one), and of course a lingerie enthusiast. I have always loved this blog not only for the good reviews but also a bit selfishly, as we share some of the same tastes and closer sizes than most lingerie writers I find (which in turn makes it even easier for me to buy more lingerie, just what I need), so I am endlessly honoured to be able to contribute anything to this lovely space!
As far as I can remember, I have always rationalised my lingerie addiction as such. Most girls I've met have some sort of shopping vice. My mum loves bags. My best friend goes gaga over shoes. I've seen jewellery, perfumes, makeup, scarves, basically anything you can think of substituted into those places for any variety of women, and while I do like all those things mine is underwear and bras. And always has been. It's the first section I gravitate to in any shop and what I buy most of, and I'm not entirely sure why. It might be because I've had the same Parisian black leather purse since I was 16 (and I will be lost the day it wears out) or because I'm 5' 10" I tend to stick to flat and tall boots for my footwear, but I feel most comfortable accumulating lingerie. My mother is fond of saying I've gone through more bras then she has in her entire life, and she's probably not wrong, but how can I help myself when every new season there's some new colour or cut to be found lurking in the corners of the lingerie universe! So without further ado I will present some of my favourites:
These bras are my top of the 'most comfortable' category. I'm not the biggest fan of padding (mainly because the ratio of my bust to padding becomes about 1:4) so these are a few of my favourites for either when I'm feeling lazy, or when I'm stress eating Quorn hot dogs at 3am after the latest Game of Thrones episode. They're all comfortable enough that sometimes I fall sleep in them by accident as I've forgotten I'm wearing a bra. 
The blue bra is something I picked up from my US trip over Christmas. I went into Urban Outfitters with the intent on finding a suitable evening gown for a family function and instead left with half the underwear section. This one is the standout however, because of the colour and cut. It's a very retro type bra with the thick straps and full coverage, but as a bonus it does the impossible and actually produces a bit of cleavage for me! Which is nice when I want that. It's made by Kimchi Blue and I wear an XS.
The heart one is The Mrs, made by Playful Promises, a company which I believe Lamb has reviewed (I think she even has the same bra). Like many companies they do not make an XS so I've altered a S, which is something I've become accustomed to doing. The craftsmanship is flawless though, this set and I have been going strong for 3 years now and there isn't a stitch out of place. 
The nude is just one of my typical boring lace triangle bras which I pick up in random locations. This one I got from Anthropologie, though the actual company is La Fée Verte. This is the first one I've ever found that actually has a small running fit in XS, which I tend to favour as it means no alterations!
Next up are my favourite daily sets, for when my activities require me to wear a real bra opposed to my comfortable ones. Think tight clothing, formal wear, or see through items. Both of these bras are actually from Topshop. I don't know why people ever look down on high street lingerie, because I adore it. You can find really, really cute lingerie that doesn't break the bank at a multitude of shops, though I do tend to favour Topshop. Again I do struggle to find 29 bands so most of what I buy is 30A, which I then add extra hooks on to. But for a £10-£18 bra, you really can't do better. The red one I bought around valentine's day, but I love the demi-cup cut and bow accents, while the ivory I bought more recently as I am a sucker for lace anything!
Lastly are some of my special occasion sets. When I need an extra boost for the day, or for a special night as I do always feel better if my bra and pants are matching. I am a huge advocate of wearing lingerie for yourself, I do the cleaning in lingerie, I study in it, and watch tv like a slug on the couch in it. If you don't have anyone to wear lingerie sets for, who cares, wear them for yourself. As far as I've found when I am involved in boudoir activities with the other half, my lingerie ends up in a crumpled pile or stolen off the floor by the pug, and these babies need use! So I like to wear them when doing menial things just as much as I do the other scenario.
The writing set, I picked up from my last trip in Paris. As far as longline bras go, it is a dream. The boning doesn't stick me and the light shaping makes your bust look very attractive (even if you barely have one!) I got it in a 30A/XS set, and it fits fairly true to size. I'm not usually a massive fan of shirred back pants but these ones I will give a pass.
The mint set is my tried and true Topshop set, which has never disappointed me. Mint is a good summer colour, and the ribbon detailing on these sold me.
I realise that I glazed over the pants section, and it's probably because bras excite me more. Pants to me are just that, they're cute and I have a lot, but they're generally easy to fit and find, where bras present more of a challenge I suppose. I do love my cotton/lace thongs though, if you can show me a more comfortable pair of underwear I welcome the challenge haha.

I may have to do another master post in the future highlighting my favourite designer sets, but we just moved house so I still have a few boxes buried around me. Either way it was a lot of fun to show you all some of my tried and true, and I hope all my fellow lingerie addicts and small busted girls have maybe found some new companies to try or just enjoyed reading. 
Till next time,

What Lamb's Wearing Wednesday

I haven't shared a WLWW post for 2 weeks but it should be apparent that in that time i've given up on the British summer and gone back to my winter blacks. For the next, ooh probably ten months, my lingerie will be the most colourful part of my outfits. Y'know i don't think i actually own any black knickers. I should probably change that.
I've been getting some use out of my pretty bralettes a lot recently, in particular the ones i forgot i owned. Which includes this Agent Provocateur Suki bra. I'm not a fan of wearing non moulded bras under tight clothes so this wool ballet wrap on top was a good idea. Not to mention it kept me warm at an early morning car boot sale, and gives a seriously lush 80's power silhouette.
As per i'm wearing a bodycon so the usual rules apply to avoid vpl and a Topshop thong always fits the bill. No surprise there!

V

V.
Having a positive self image is a natural consequence of confidence and confidence isn't something that just pops up on a whim one day and stays for a lifetime (that would be a schnorrer for all those not well versed in yiddish). However, by faking a bit of confidence and not allowing any negative thoughts to slip into your conscious, you can gain the same positive self image.
If you've been following and adhering to the previous commandments then you've already stopped having negative opinions on others and you've stopped giving weight to the negative opinions of other people, so now it's time to treat yourself in the same way. I'm of the belief that all humans are created, should be considered, equal. So if you're going to treat others in the highest regard and with respect, well then you'll just have to treat yourself that way too. It's simple, next time you go to make a negative jab at yourself even if it's just in good humour, stop and make yourself consider something positive instead. Avoid creating a positive thought from a negative opinion, like, "well at least i don't look like her, eheheh." That's not going to help yourself in anyway. Consider how your small bust affects you in a positive way, the times when you feel comfortable, confident or when having a small bust has really worked for you. 
Although this may be the simplest of my five commandments to describe, it is in fact the hardest to implicate and the behaviour that will hold most weight when it comes to finally gaining some confidence. At first you'll struggle and it will be more like an afterthought instead of a behaviour correction. But stick with it. Start with the little things that you maybe take for granted. Don't try and consider some massive overall positive, because it's doubtful that you'll really believe in what you're saying. Pick something like, "I'm wearing a non supportive bra and i'm not experiencing any discomfort," or, "The size of my chest fits well with and suits the rest of my body," or, "i went rock climbing without a sports bra and my bust didn't get in the way." 
When thoughts like that have become second nature then move your positive thoughts onto aesthetics. Comment on what parts of your bust you like the look of. It can sound ridiculous but i personally like the swell of the bottom of my breasts. Don't lie to yourself, i guarantee there's more than one aspect of your bust that you actually kind of like. Think hard and focus on all these individual parts of you.
Following through with this transition of negative opinions to positive thoughts will completely alter the way you see yourself, most of the time and eventually.

 Other posts in this series:
Introduction
I
II
III
IV

*This "commandment" is only a suggestion and i in no way pass any judgement on those who chose to embrace different or contradictory behaviours. This is purely something that i, personally, find helpful towards being a more positive and confident person. These are all my own opinions and do not have any scientific weight behind them. I respect everyone's right to an opinion and understand that my own opinion should not apply to everyone else.

IV

We all have our own pick me ups, in times of need. Be it a slick of red lipstick or a solo trip to your favourite restaurant. Heck, someone i know likes to play the Game of Thrones card game by himself, always Lannisters against Greyjoys. These things never fail to cheer us up and if they did then we'd ditch them and find something new to treat ourselves with. When you're insecure about a part of yourself then you experience high points, where you feel unaffected by your issues, and low points, where they become all you can focus on. Like being in a bad mood, or having a rubbish day, these low times should be remedied with a pick me up. A treat that targets the specific issue you've taken grievance with.
A treat that can not only raise your general mood but elevate your confidence towards this insecurity is what you need. Unfortunately it's not so easy to treat your low confidence about a small bust. When you catch sight of someone with a perfect cleavage, or the greatest sideboob, you can't treat your jealousy to dinner. If you come across a bra that you need but isn't made in your size or a bra that just won't fit no matter how hard you try, well you can't challenge your disappointment to a role playing card game. When someone makes a nasty comment about you being an inferior woman or claims they're a "breast person" and you don't fit the bill, you can't apply lipstick to your insecurities. Whilst these techniques may work to raise your mood, they won't make you feel better about embracing the body you have.
I'm easily pleased with material things, lingerie and shoes to be exact (as if you don't already know that by visiting my blog). So when i'm really feeling down and wondering how many shifts at work i'd need to afford a breast augmentation, I head straight to the top floor of Topshop. This is where their lingerie section lives, and more specifically, their collection of very delicate, very tiny, lacy bralettes. Topshop never lets me down in this department. Every season, sometimes twice a season, new little bras and bralettes and bandeaus appear on the shop floor, almost designed for the small busted. For most they'd be purely decorative, but not for us. These little delights are not very expensive, and are often left over in great batches, all reduced to a mere pittance. Prancing around in something pretty, seeing how your bust fills out the fabric, not experiencing any discomfort, well that's a treat.
Those who don't find the same kind of pleasure in the intimate parts of Topshop could consider different treats. Maybe a massage that targets the torso area, or a new push up bra, a romantic night with your significant other, a long pamper session or taking a life drawing class. Try anything that can raise your mood, specifically when you're feeling down about your insecurities. You want to find something that can make you feel good about the things you dislike about your body, time and time again.

Other posts in this series:
Introduction
I
II
III
V

*This "commandment" is only a suggestion and i in no way pass any judgement on those who chose to embrace different or contradictory behaviours. This is purely something that i, personally, find helpful towards being a more positive and confident person. These are all my own opinions and do not have any scientific weight behind them. I respect everyone's right to an opinion and understand that my own opinion should not apply to everyone else.

III

III.
Take a long hard look in the mirror. Don't focus on you muffin top or acne scars, forget your love hate relationship with McDonald's double cheese burgers. Stop worrying about the chipped polish on your toenails that's been there six months or that stripe of fuzz down the front of your leg, y'know the one you always seem to miss whilst shaving.
 If you're familiar with the impressionist movement of the 19th century and the cubist movement in the early 20th century then I'd suggest you put your artist's hat on. Look at your body, focusing on the areas you struggle with, and look past your flaws. Start with a Monet approach and strip your body down to light. Take stock of where and how the light falls. Try unfocusing your eyes and only seeing the boundaries between light and shade. Then move on to Cezanne and consider the colours that are present and how they add depth. Focus your image so the blurs of light intensity become soft lines. If you have the time, consider your body in the style of Renoir or Degas, keeping everything soft but forming something more solid. 
Moving on from a study of light to a study of shape and structure, think Picasso. Take your soft lines and make them bold. Either mentally, or physically if you have any talent with drawing a la this amazing post from Toots, outline the shapes that make up your body. A triangle here, three curves there, a teardrop, an ellipse, maybe an octagon if you feel it has a place. One condition to this exercise, unless your breasts are perfectly circular, they can't be assigned circles. Think again. Once you can see your body in an abstract sense, and in terms of light and shade then it's time to look at yourself as a person again. 
Really focus on your bust. Think about the way it falls, how the tissue is distributed, where the volume is greatest, whether your breasts meet at the centre of your breastbone or have space in between. Look at the distance from your shoulders to the top of your breasts, feel their weight, assess how they feel in your hands and check for lumps while you're at it! Consider which breast is smaller or if theres no noticible difference (we all have one side of our body that is smaller but its not always immediately apparent). Be objective and refuse to allow your focus to wander into detrimental thoughts. If you're assigning a description to a certain characteristic of your bust then choose a neutral word. Don't say your breasts sag or are low hanging, rather that the greatest volume of tissue is found at the bottom of your breasts, or they're bottom heavy. Aim to be completely familiar with the geometry of your bust. 
Having knowledge of, and appreciating all the little details of your least favourite bits, especially with an area as variable as the bust, can lead to affection and even a wee bit of self confidence.

Other posts in this series:

*This "commandment" is only a suggestion and i in no way pass any judgement on those who chose to embrace different or contradictory behaviours. This is purely something that i, personally, find helpful towards being a more positive and confident person. These are all my own opinions and do not have any scientific weight behind them. I respect everyone's right to an opinion and understand that my own opinion should not apply to everyone else.

II

II.
Go on, ditch it. Throw it back in the drawer and leave it alone for a day. Pick out something that has no padding, no moulded cups. Think ahead and plan an outfit that won't make you feel self conscious and activities that won't leave you feeling uncomfortable. 
Padding can be both a small busted girls best friend, and her sworn enemy. At some point in bra making history there seemed to be an influx of designers and marketers that were convinced every bra for a small bust would have to contain padding, most of it non removable. I mean who wants to look like they have a small chest, right? Considering most girls start off with a small bust during puberty this sends an awful message. Apparently a small bust is something to be ashamed of, something we should disguise. 
To shun your padded bras with moulded cups for a period of time, is to remember what your actual bust looks like when it's not being enhanced. I'm of the belief that years of wearing padded bras, and never taking a break, can warp your self image. A push up bra, in a sense, can become part of your anatomy. When you think about how an item of clothing is going to fit you, you think about your enhanced bust. When you're making plans to go out for an evening, and want to look "your best", you think about your enhanced bust. Hey, it even gets to a point when your spatial awareness includes your enhanced bust. You see what i'm getting at? Never once do you really stop to think about what you actually have. 
It's so detrimental to confidence to be constantly comparing your natural self to a false enhanced version. Wearing a push up bra everyday is akin to wearing make-up every day. One day you just won't feel confident going without and not so long after that you'll start to genuinely prefer a false image (and yes, i've been in both situations. And whilst i enjoy my small bust for what it is now, i still can't stand my face without foundation and contouring).
So wear your padded bra and moulded cups as much as you want but take a day out here or there to actually appreciate, and remember, how your bust looks without. You might be surprised at how you feel towards it at the end of the day.

Other posts in this series:

*This "commandment" is only a suggestion and i in no way pass any judgement on those who chose to embrace different or contradictory behaviours. This is purely something that i, personally, find helpful towards being a more positive and confident person. These are all my own opinions and do not have any scientific weight behind them. I respect everyone's right to an opinion and understand that my own opinion should not apply to everyone else.

I

I. 
Don't pass any negative judgements about someone else's appearance. Just don't go there. It doesn't matter how ridiculous a person looks to you, or how many people you respect are indulging in their inner mean girl, their body is not your problem. And it's not your right to make it a problem. It should not concern you in any way and making negative comments about someone else will only reenforce the negative feelings you have about yourself. Gaining a feeling of empowerment from putting someone else down is a myth. It doesn't happen. I should add that finding comedic value in putting someone else down is a poor way of behaving and can only provide testament to the way you feel about yourself. 
I know all of this because i used to be a nasty little Lamb. I'd be the first to comment on the way someone looked or spread a vicious rumour. When you have low self confidence it becomes so easy to pick out the flaws on others. But all it serves to do is make you hyper aware of your own flaws and the people who may, in turn, be judging you. It's not a case of "haters must be jealous." More that those who chose to be hateful towards another person's appearance usually have deep rooted issues with their own appearances. This isn't an easy habit to get out of, but it's well worth trying. If you catch yourself engaging in, or about to engage in making nasty comments about someone, remind yourself that it's not your problem. That you shouldn't expend any more time or energy just to concern yourself with a body that does not belong to you. Apologise to the person you're with (even if they're not the person your comments were direct towards), or ask them not to encourage you. By not scrutinising the appearance of others, you can reduce the amount you, unconsciously, scrutinise yourself.
People who push their negative feelings onto those with the opposite type of body are just as insecure. "Real girls have curves," and, "Boobs are like soda, no one likes them flat," are just, if they come from someone who identifies as a female (because misogyny is a whole different, nasty ball park), the manifestations of their own insecurities. I used to be guilty of the, "I'm flat chested and very insecure about it so therefore massive breasts are disgusting. Who would want saggy tits, or large nipples, etc." It's very easy to convince yourself that you own those opinions, when in reality you're just desperately searching for the negatives to bring everyone down to your level. Faking confidence by hurting others is just as damaging to you as it is to them.
And likewise, if someone tries to pass judgement on you, to put you down for your appearance then remind yourself, and them if possible, that your body is not their problem and their negative opinions are not valid. 

Other posts in this series:

*This "commandment" is only a suggestion and i in no way pass any judgement on those who chose to embrace different or contradictory behaviours. This is purely something that i, personally, find helpful towards being a more positive and confident person. These are all my own opinions and do not have any scientific weight behind them. I respect everyone's right to an opinion and understand that my own opinion should not apply to everyone else.

An introduction

At some point in our lives we all experience some kind of body acceptance. We recognise that we are the way we are and either we have to learn to live with that or do something about it. Unfortunately body acceptance doesn't often lead itself to body confidence. We begrudge ourselves the right to not obsess over our self confessed (and not universally agreed upon) flaws but we rarely allow ourselves to develop a genuine positive attitude about it. This comes about, mostly, because it's not sodding easy to change deeply ingrained behavioural patterns. When your own flaws can feel like the elephant in the room at all times how can you suddenly learn to love them? I'm no cognitive behavioural therapist but i am working towards being confident about what i used to believe was one of my biggest flaws (or defects as i've referred to it before), my small bust. I don't have unwavering confidence about this part of me, and i probably never will do, but most days i'm happy with what i've got. And more importantly, during the times where i do falter i've managed to develop coping mechanisms that can help me quickly get back to accepting and enjoying the body i have.
Over the next week i will share my, personal, five commandments, over five consecutive days, that i swear by for gaining a little bit of confidence. Although these posts as a whole are aimed at gaining confidence in a small bust, many of the commandments can be used by those wanting to gain a general love of their body or bust, whatever size they may be. Everyone is different, however, and what may work and be a revelation to me or others might seem wholly ridiculous, or very obvious to you. If, at any point, when reading these posts you feel like you want to share your own commandments towards body confidence, not limited to just those with a small bust, then please do share them in the comments. I'd love to end this week with a master list of techniques and behaviours that can help someone towards being happy in themselves.

Other posts in this series:

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